Well I haven't had a lot of time to blog lately. I guess I won't be getting those advertisers to pay me money to be on my blog, Damn! Everything has kind of been a whirl wind.

Jeannie and I did get to escape to Hawaii for four days which was a great chance to relax. It didn't feel like as much of a break as I thought it would. Jeannie and I have been together 14 years without kids and 5 months with kids. It was more like, wait was that a dream that we had kids for the past 5 months. We had a blast and the girls stayed with Tres Abolitas ( the three grandmas) Marjie, her best friend Colleen Foster and my Mom. A big thank you to them!

And that brings us to this week. I am officially Mr. Mom. Jeannie leaves for work in the morning and I have the girls. It is so strange and feels like such a role reversal but I have been having fun. I do love my girls. They are so cute and so sweet and I seem to be able to handle anything they can throw at me (knock on wood!). My days now consist of walks, bottle feeding, cleaning, laundry and making dinner for Jeannie. I am a 50's house wife. I am cool with it though it is better than going to work! However, I still work. Jeannie comes home and we basically high five and she takes the girls and I get ready to go out and play music. Such a weird switch to play music for people drinking and having dinner after hanging with the girls all day.

So not many funny stories today, just trying to keep everyone updated! Oh I did find a great recipe for Risotto in a crock pot which is real easy and you don't have to stir it for two hours. Anyone know how to get poop stains out of PJ's?

I am still here

Today these two super girls are sucking the life out of me. Jeannie asked if I wanted a break today ( meaning she hold a girl for five minutes while I regain my sanity). I said "no I just want to run off into the hills and never come back." I know someday I will say they are the best thing that ever happened to me and I can't imagine life without them, but today is not that day, and tomorrow isn't looking good either.

Thank you to those of you who just say "it must be hard" that means so much. A little compassion and understanding. I know people have it, have had it, and will have it way harder than we do. However this is our reality right now. I know no different. I just know that having twin daughters is kicking my ass right now. It is also kicking my marriage in the ass.

Luckily Jeannie and I have a strong bond that I believe can withstand most anything. I am slowly regaining sanity because Jeannie just left with Maggie and I put Phoebe down for a nap so I have a few precious moments to communicate my thoughts. For those of you that know me , I am about as real as it gets and I am not gonna lie and sugar coat how I feel. I love these girls dearly but man it is tough.

One amazing part of my life is that I get to go out and play music for a living. My job is awesome and helps me stay alive, but it does not recharge me. I love hanging with people and having relationships and right now I have none but my three girls which is really hard for a social extravert like myself. I know this is just a season and things will change. I don't believe anymore that they will get easier , just different.

Having twin daughters does teach you a life lesson about patience and selfishness. I am starting to become more selfless which is probably a good thing. Realizing that my life is not my own and I have to help two other life forms who could not survive without me, crazy I...... HOLY CRAP PHOEBE CAN"T BE WAKING UP... is has been 20 F$%%king minutes. Please pray I don't throw her out the window!!!

Hugs and Kisses

another night's adventures!

Last night was a little back slide in the sleep cycle but we are still doing good. However this was going through my head last night .....

Some people have told me now that I have two little girls I have a sense of how much God loves me. Not my experience so far. Last night I felt more like the God of the Old Testament. I wanted to throw Maggie out the window! I would rock her for 30 min and then she would be sound asleep and I would try to lay her down. The second I pulled my hand away her eyes shoot open and she starts to cry.

Babies and People for that matter can be so annoying and frustrating. Oh your town is sexually immoral BURN IT, Noah is the only righteous man on the planet DROWN THE REST!! Egypt won't release the Israelites 10 Plagues on you and kill the pharaohs first born!!! SO yeah I guess I did have a glimpse into how God feels.

after waking up at 3:50 AM to help feed the girls I stumbled back to bed at about 5:30 and passed out.

The next thing I knew it was 8 o'clock. Jeannie had left for work and Marjie had let me sleep in. Then I walked in the living room and saw Phoebe's face. So cute I can't even describe. I do love my girls :) I think I will let them live :)

It has been a while ....

Sorry spelling and punctuation have left my skill set. Good luck :)

Wow, This raising twins thing has taken a little bit out of me :) Not a lot of free time to sit around and blog. However this is the second time my wife has taken the girls to Cambria and given me the precious gift of a night alone.

So like everything else in life I am learning a lot through experience. The main thing I am learning is no one knows your experience. Whether you have one baby or triplets, your first or fifth child, no one can predict or truly know your experience. Not all baby tips and tricks work. It is all trial and error (this is for you knew or expecting parents, you veterans are saying "DUH" right now). I believe the first year is all about survival. I have never understood how someone could shake a baby to death until I had the girls. Don't get me wrong we love the girls and are so thankful for them. I know that sounds horrible but both Jeannie and I have handed one of the girls to each other with that look in our eyes that says "if you don't take this child I cannot guarantee their safety".

The one thing I have realized that I never want to hear and I hope I will never say to new parents is,"oh I know how it is". Nobody wants to hear that , nobody wants you to top their experience. The best thing you can say is," that is so hard, stay strong it will get better," or "Can I help , it must be so challenging". I know my friends are getting tired of me trumping all their newborn stories. Sorry friends.

Now that I said that - TWINS IS WAY HARDER THAN ONE BABY- WE HAVE TWO, TWO, to make it fare we should at least have two other full time people to pull this off. Luckily we have had Marjie my Mother-in-law and many awesome friends.

Here is some specific props and love to people that have provided serious help to us!

Aunt Stacy and Uncle David

Aunt Suzy

Aunt Kristin and Uncle Eric

Uncle Bill and Aunt Michelle

Rebekah Law

Kelz ( like Madonna all you need to say is Kelz or Kells)

Kim Schissler

Kelsey and Whitney

Shelley King

Colleen Franco

Steph Zambo

Grandma Colleen and Grandpa Tim

Thank YOU!!!

Many nights I am deep in sleep dreaming about killing and invading Alien horde in the streets of New York city. Or looking for land from the crows nest of a pirate ship before I turn into an eagle and fly to freedom. When suddenly I hear the cry of a smaller bird back on the ship. No, it is a box of kittens, no wait .... and suddenly I wake from my peaceful sleep of about two hours to hear the cry of one of our beautiful babies. So I get up slowly and walk to the girls room. Then I figure out which one is crying, change her daiper and bring her to Mom to feed. And just as I relax on the foot of the bed, the other one starts crying. Then I do the same routine and bring the other baby to Mom. By this time the first one is done and I have to try and burp her and put her down before the other one is done. If I can do this all succssefully then Mom doesn't have to get up and If I can prevent Mom from getting up that is the goal. If Grandma is there I want to keep her asleep so that when the girls wake up at 5:30 she will entertain them for a couple hours so we can get a little more sleep. This is most every night.

At least I am not physically bound to be by the girls every couple of hours like Jeannie is. I would do almost anything right now to give my wife a full 24 hours off to sleep and be pampered at a spa. She so deserves it!

Just when I think, "Why the hell did we have kids?" I look down and see this.

I cannot wait for the girls to get older. I know people say don't wish it away but I am not a baby person. I want them to be little girls so we can go ride bikes and try and roller skate and do art projects. I know those days will come and go before I know it, but I am so excited. They are finally big enough to go on regular walks in the ergo carriers and almost big enought to cruise around in the BOB stroller. They are not quite 10 lbs yet and they are 11 weeks old.

I found out that there are a lot of people who actually read this besides my Mom. Thanks :) and I will try and do this more regularly.

So I have been out of the loop, Right now everything is pretty repetitive. Feed, Sleep, poop, pee, repeat. I have noticed that the girls are getting bigger. Another realization I made is that I am not that into babies. I cannot wait for them to get bigger:)

Sleep Deprivation

Don't be fooled, I took this picture because it is as rare as capturing Bigfoot on film!

Everything every parent told me was right! Everyone said " Get your sleep now!" but you can't possibly know until after you have the kids how little and sporadic sleep you are going to get. Only those of you who are already parents could possibly know. There is no preparation for this no matter how many people warn you or tell you from their own experience.

Then there is twins! It is fricking insane. Praise God we have my Mother-in-Law Marjie staying with us and helping out. Without her I would either be

1. Die

2. I would have sold a baby on the black market (white babies fetch quite a price)

3. Packed my camping gear and headed off into the hills to be a hermit.

4. I would have killed a random homeless person.

All that was avoided by the selflessness of my Mother-In-Law, (here to referred to as Marjie).So you had one baby and thought it was hard! Two babies at once.... TWO BABIES! It is as crazy as it seems and are girls are doing amazing and we are having almost no real problems. I can't imagine what it would be like if they were difficult or colicky or something, just thinking of that gives me nightmares.

It is Tuesday morning , at least I think it is. For the past two weeks there is only one night that I had over four hours of consecutive sleep and I know it is just the beginning. We have to feed every three hours and Jeannie has to pump so this whole process takes about and hour and a half. Then we get a hour and a half break and begin the process all over again. I am so thankful that my job is playing music, I can barely pull it off. I have zoned out a couple of time behind the mic but all in all I think I am pulling it off okay. Right when I think I can't do this anymore or I am going to loose my mind, Marjie steps in and relieves us and saves the day!!

My wife.... She is amazing. She gets less sleep than me guaranteed because she is the owner operator of the Cross Dairy specializing in nutritional raw milk (Cheese and Ice cream coming soon!). She barely complains and she has shown very little emotional or hormonal distress. Jeannie has come through this whole process like a champ and she is definitely in the 95 percentile of successful Motherhood,(just like everything else she does).

So that is our days as of now. Feed, sleep, rest, change diapers, hold babies, change diapers, feed, rest, sleep, change diapers. ...........

Alright! Day 10 of being a Dad. Talk about learning something new everyday. Last night I learned that if you don't double check if you did the diaper right your daughter shits all over Grandma ! Whoops.

So now I have diapers dialed in. I am learning what things are most important to a new Dad, and I have decided to share my list with you! It is not a long list mind you , Lucky you :)

1.

This book is awesome, well I didn't read it but I watched the movie and it has helped so much in soothing the girls and calming them down. The nurses at the hospital didn't really know it and they thought I was the baby whisperer! Guys, watch this movie, it well save you from shaking your child to death or giving them up for adoption!

2. Gentlemen, Your wives boobs are gonna look awesome! Awesome.. Right! Well they are not for you, and your wife does not want them to be touched and by the time you can touch them again, they probably won't be as awesome, but they may return to their former glory. To quote Brandon Rogers " they are like an oasis in the dessert you keep thinking you are getting close but you can never quite touch the water" (sorry Brandon not an exact quote)

3. EARPLUGS!! This is another necessity. TO sleep it blocks out all the crazy baby noises and if you have an inconsolable baby you can hold them while they cry and it won't drive you crazy! Seriously , ear plugs . Get them!

4. Iphone or smart phone, or ipad.... There are many hours that you will be sitting watching babies, holding babies, waiting to feed babies, watching your wife pump milk. With the Iphone I was able to watch late night with Jimmy Fallon on my phone, or play angry birds while waiting for babies to go to sleep, or taking pictures of babies and posting them on facebook. I made a movie of the babies first bath edited it and sent it to the Grandparents.It gives the ADD child of the 80's Dad something to occupy his busy mind with. Your wife may not be a big fan of this! Keep it on the down low

5. Beer, Two beers a day just helps everything Go a little better around dinner time :) , more than two beers..... no .... never .... no, okay sometimes.

Well I guess those are the most important things to me right now:) Tonight is date night , Grandmas are babysitting and Jeannie and I are going out to dinner :) so excited.

Until next time.....